“When I said I’d wanted to gain weight…this wasn’t really what I meant.” -me to other half
September 19, 2019
Pregnancy tests are a weird concept. There I was in the tampon aisle at the grocery store – only this time – I wasn’t buying tampons. I’m not a person that gets embarrassed, but there’s something awkward about looking at pregnancy tests with five other people in the aisle.
I’ve always told my friends that if they ever think they’re pregnant and are too scared to buy a test, I will go to the store for them. It’s always an offer I have on the table for them in me showing my support. However, none of them have actually taken me up on this offer, so my first time buying a pregnancy test was, in fact, for myself.
Taking the test was even more awkward…
Listen, I’ll pee in front of absolutely anyone. I really have no shame at all – but when your other half is staring at you intently while you’re trying to pee on a stick, you really do just end up getting up to close the bathroom door.
First of all, after peeing a billion times today…for some reason I just couldn’t pee on this stick. Getting aggravated with myself and cranky, I finally forced enough out to pee on two tests. Now we play the waiting game…
“I hope you don’t mind, I put my pee sticks on your counter.” – me to other half
So..Am I Pregnant?
“Do you want me to look first, or do you want to look first? Or should we look together?” – me to other half
I’m not going to lie, looking was scary – but I couldn’t wait any longer to make a decision on who’s looking… so I looked first. Those two little pink lines made my heart skip a beat. I wasn’t really sure how to feel.
Truthfully, I knew I was pregnant before I even took the tests. I mostly took them for clarification and to ease the mind of other half.
So many questions flooded through my head.
How? Why right now? Can I afford this? How do I tell my mom? Oh, and I definitely laughed when I saw the result. See the thing is, honesty is really healthy for a relationship. So when other half came in to see the results as well, I had already started laughing. Surely this was a joke. But it’s not. Being The rest of the night was mellow but, truth be told, I am scared.
But I AM filled with love and joy for ‘baby’ and my new life adventure: being a mom. I hope you join me on my new journey as I talk about what I’m going through during this pregnancy and the rest of my life as a mom.